...and that hit me hard. These messages came from someone very dear to me, a person who has been a very big influence in my life. For the sake of this paragraph, let's call this person 'AA.' AA really helped me forget about my past and gave me a hand to hold to get hopes for future. I grew up not having many interactions with others from a young age and had participated only in selective conversations in my surrounding. AA was one of the only few individuals I genuinely enjoyed talking to and could give my trust to after things happened in my past. My teenage just needed a little light to see but AA came in illuminating every corner of it. Life is strange and so was me meeting a person like this. I can count only a few instances in my life when truly good things have happened to me, and this was undoubtedly one of the best. I am with a desire to be worthy of such a gift. Holding AA's hand, I decided to shift my focus from trying to be like others in my surroundings to myself and pursue the dreams I had cherished since childhood.

It's a rarity for such a caring person to become upset with me, but when it does happen, there's usually a valid reason behind it. I was tired at that time, so much so that I was hesitant to even do basic trigonometric calculations. My brain was lazy as it can be. Looking at this, there shouldn't be any doubt for getting a scolding. Especially when you are trying to sit for entrance examinations for universities where they don't even give you enough time per question. I took some time to reflect on this and realized that not only am I here, but I am also not sufficiently quick at performing basic arithmetic calculations compared to the expected standard. My primary interest lies in understanding how algorithms function or how to find a better one and the reasoning behind their operations, rather than simply solving specific problems fast using formulas given before me without explanation of how they came. Even now, the way we do multiplication and division using the most common algorithms, most of us don't question why we do it in that way. But I can't deny that Swift mental calculations are a necessity, and there's no room for excuses for taking longer than the allotted time.

I'm not extraordinary, nor do I possess any exceptional talents, but I have always been passionate about pursuing the things I love. One of those passions is Computer Science and the STEM field. However, gaining entry into this field is no easy feat, regardless of one's level of interest. To get a better education about these subjects, I require to secure a place in prestigious universities, you need to excel academically, striving to be an A+ student. So, I had no choice but to become a participant in this competitive arena. I persevered in my studies, but all I can say is that I'm average compared to others that are above me academically. Extraordinary students abound, individuals who have dedicated significant time to sharpening their abilities. Perhaps I didn't put in the same level of effort, or maybe some of my abilities haven't reached the extraordinary standards I aspire to.

I fear if I don't have these then maybe I'm taking a risk about my dreams. Never have I ever attained a Computer Science class officially, but I really wish to. The chances of me being able to take one in future will decrease if I continue remaining the same down this path. Perhaps AA was right, and even though it hurt the first-time hearing that, I hold those words close to my heart. I need to remember these words and work on myself to be deserving of my dreams and AA as well. AA can't live forever with me, so I have to take care of myself.

This is just a tool for myself that I made to make a significant progress regarding it. There are so many things I have to take care of at the same it. Nevertheless, if you wish to use this as a game, passing time partner, or anything, feel free to do so. At the end, I know I can't be perfect, but AA and people close to me always deserves a better human with them for me. I can't say they deserve a better person and push them away, because I want their presence forever with me. Then looks like the only option is to be that better person that I wish them to have. Wish me luck and I wish you luck too. Hope this project helps you as I'm hoping it will to me.